the Guest Lectures:

The Pateeti Freeze

Pateet was a peaceful planet, characterized by a near-vertical axis and a permanently mild climate, shallow oceans, and millions of islands scattered about the equator. The Pateeti culture, set at ease by the cornucopia of fish and fruit the planet offered, dedicated itself to the simple pleasures of life. The humanoid natives, especially the females, were exceptionally beautiful and hospitable, and any spacefarer passing through the sector made sure to visit Pateet to assist in the scientific investigation of the reproductive compatibility of various humanoid races and Pateeti.

The stories of the Mutiny on the Bouncer, where the crew set their captain adrift (please don't mention this episode to Captain Blighty of Blitzen, it's a bit of a sore point) and returned to Pateet to make off with their paramours to a distant moon; and of Gobank the Ferengi banker turned artist, are among the romantic tales told of the eternal lure of the lovelies of the Pateeti.

Alas, eternity doesn't last forever. A cosmic near-collision knocked Pateet out of its orbit. The planet gyrated and wobbled for a century, causing devestating earthquakes and tidal waves, and demolishing the Pateeti civilization; until the world stabilized in a new orbit further from its sun. The new climate was fifty degrees cooler on average than the old, and the equatorial islands became icelocked, all of their native flora and fauna wiped out.

The few who survived the century of cataclysm have been trying desperately to create a new arctic society, with the help of the arctic creatures who migrated from the polar areas with the big freeze, and to keep the ember of the once-tropical paradise glowing. Princess Hopahulaluya, our guest speaker, is a representative of the KoahuerenKahayemet, the Pateeti National Fund which is collecting specimens of arctic and sub-arctic plants in an attempt to make the new frozen Pateet liveable. Please transfer credit to the little blue boxes you will see around the hall, and a tree will be planted in your name on Pateet. .